Liam Neeson shared some eyebrow-raising comments about how he dealt with his friends horrific rape experience, in a new interview.

Liam Neeson, 66, got a few things off his chest in a new interview with the Independent.The Taken actor recalled what happened the time he returned from a trip overseas to learn that a loved one had been raped.“She handled the situation of the rape in the most extraordinary way,” the actor said during the interview, before revealing how he had reacted to the situation.“I went up and down areas with a cosh, hoping Id beapproached by somebody.Im ashamed to say that, and I did it for maybe a week – hoping some black bast**d would come out of a pub and have a go at me about something, you know?So that I could kill him,” he said.

Liam kept the honesty rolling during the press junket, which was for his new film,Cold Pursuit.He went on to admit that he is now “ashamed” of his past “awful” behavior.“It was horrible, horrible, when I think back, that I did that,” he said.“And Ive never admitted that, and Im saying it to a journalist.God forbid,” he added.“But I did learn a lesson from it, when I eventually thought, What the f**k are you doing, you know?”

The incredibly personal revelation came when the actor was asked to give more insight into his character in Cold Pursuit, says the Independent.The film portrays a man, Nels Coxman, and his yearning for revenge after his son is murdered by a gang.Clearly, the character hits close to home for Liam, who can identify with that desire for revenge all too well.“I think audience members live to see that,” Liam said of onscreen violence.“They can kind of live vicariously through it.People say, Yeah but violence in films makes people want to go out and kill people.I dont believe that at all,” he went on to say.

Liams new film, Cold Pursuit, opens in theaters February 8, 2019.The flick is also set to star actresses Emmy Rossum, and Laura Dern.